Manifesting Dreams & Surrendering Control

It’s been a trying few months. It has been the kind of months where I thought, It can’t get worse than this, and then it would. Or I’d perceive it that way. I’d perceive life as a constant fight I couldn’t win. I was getting hit from all sides, hard hits, soft hits, painful hits. All of them from the past, present, and future. The mind controlling me in the most painful way possible—I wasn’t enough.

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When I’m feeling this way, I write. I write a word or I write ten thousand words. Anything to release what is in me—pain, sadness, resentment. I’m a student of life. I learn as I go, and I experience triggers. I experience obstacles because that is how we learn. At times it’s easy to forget that we are still learning when we are in the role of guide, or coach in my case. But we are. We are all constantly learning and growing. We evolve with each morning we wake up to and rise with each night we lay our heads to rest.

With challenging months, I was forced to face so many things in my life (some I was aware of and chose to ignore, and others I’m still figuring out). I was stuck in that same pattern, stuck on repeat like a song you don’t like but can’t stop humming, when I came across a reminder. “I am” affirmations. As a life coach, I teach clients to work with positive intentions in the present moment to build belief and manifest desires. The key to intentions is the combination of belief and want. When I saw a post about “I am” intentions, I was taken back to the advice I give others.

Why is it we never take our own advice?

This post reopened my eyes. I know this. I know what to do when my vibrations are low and my beliefs are crap. I decided to start working my own intentions. In the morning, mid-day, afternoon, you name it and I was affirming. I believed them. I expressed beliefs I was confident about. I am still doing it. Every chance I get I take a few seconds to mentally say my affirmations. I take a few minutes to write them down in my journal.

I felt as my mind started to calm, my soul relax. Peace entered me as I said goodbye to the constant torment I was struggling with. All of a sudden, the things I was worrying about became minimal as I made the conscious choice to live in the present, feel each breath that filled me, and spend more time with people.

It’s amazing what we can do when we make choices to look at things from a positive perspective and be present. That post I came across was exactly what I needed. I needed that gentle reminder that I can have what I want if I release control and allow the process of life to happen. I can manifest what I desire when I surrender the mind and love freely. I continue my daily intentions and breathing. I continue to trust in the grandness of the universe and know that each experience is one for me to learn from. If I resist it, the lesson will continue to hit me until I accept it and grow. If I choose to learn the lesson the first time, I will move through my journey a little lighter and wiser.

At the end of the day, I want to lay my head to rest, grateful for the gifts I’ve received (even those unanswered prayers, are gifts as well). The universe knows what we need. Our higher self knows what we need. It will feed our souls, and it is up to us to grasp those lessons and surrender to something greater than this human experience.


Examples of “I am” affirmations. We each add what we want to set as our intention.

I am healthy.

I am abundant.

I am a successful writer (insert your career).

I am at the perfect weight/size for my body.

I am beautiful.

I am in harmony.

I am in a loving and respectful relationship.

Fear for the Unknown

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Lately I’ve been rooted, stuck in place with gripping quicksand. Not the type of grounded where confidence rules you and your root chakra is aligned. Mine is shaken, all the way up to my core, where I’ve teetered between who I remember and who I’ve become because of the fear. Despite daily affirmations and weekly intentions, I have struggled to find my footing. 

Digging deep within and exploring our darkest corners can shake us. Finding what is hidden in our souls can tempt to break us. But our courage can strengthen us. Allow us to stand up and fight the demons taunting us and challenges holding us back. 

My wings are itching to fly, take me to new grounds and newer experiences. I’m itching to break the limitations I’ve created and soar. 

Who doesn’t want that freedom? 

Yet, the unknown can be intimidating. It can hold us back from finding greatness because we prefer to stay comfortable. However, I vowed to break this new routine—a routine that goes against my being. I vowed to remind myself of the strength I have always carried, the wilderness that has always guided me, and return to the free-spirit that has longed to wander this earth with an open and wild heart.

Trusting the universe, and allowing for what’s in my heart to manifest, gives me the freedom to flap those wings and understand the balance between soaring amongst the stars and returning to my home on Earth to ground and recharge. Believe in my dreams and accomplish my goals. Most importantly, live the life I have always dreamed of. The life I deserve. The life I have ached to experience.

It is so much easier to allow the weightless wings to guide you than the weight of fear to control you.

We can have all we want if we remove the uncertainty of the unfamiliar and explore it with an open mind.

A Year of Change

Stop, Drop, and Choose

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I am an over thinker. I always have been. My heart is a free spirit that wants to wander the world aimlessly, and my brain is a Capricorn. I have learned to listen with my heart, follow it more and think less of the what if. Boy, do I dislike those what ifs. They are our brain getting in the way of a lovely plan that fills our souls. Do you ever get that kick or jump in your stomach that draws your attention? I have challenged myself to listen to that and just “Stop, Drop and Choose.” Choose what my heart wants on the first try. Ask myself a question, do I stay or go? If I stop, Drop and Choose, what is the first word that pops into my mind. Don’t over think, just do.

Ever since I was a young girl, I would get that gut feeling. I had no idea what it was, but I used to describe it like anti-butterflies. My stomach would not get that warm and fuzzy feelings, but instead it would churn. It would feel heavy and uncomfortable.

If I met a guy, I would think, “He’s cute. I’ll give him a chance.” And I would, because who wouldn’t want to give a cute guy you clicked with a chance? But I would always listen to my stomach. If I got that churning, uncomfortable feeling, I would break it off. Why be with someone who does not give you the good kind of butterflies? Listen to that.

Do you get happy butterflies or churning moths? If it churns, run and run fast, from any situation. Be brave enough to do what is right for you. But if those butterflies are full of love and care, stay and enjoy the caress. Your heart and soul know what is best for you, and they try to guide you. It is up to you, and me, to listen. From what I have learned from the lessons of not listening, I am choosing to pay attention, closely.

At first it may be difficult because our minds contradict what our intuition is telling us, but with practice you become more in tune with that part of you. Once you listen to that part of you and experience all the wonderful things that can happen, this practice will become more and more a part of your life.

I have challenged myself to choose. Choose the direction I want my life to go without thinking what could go wrong or asking what if I stay. I choose to listen to my butterflies when it comes to meeting the right man, and I choose to listen to my heart so I can move forward from a place of love and compassion.

I want chances to explore my world openly, without letting my brain get in the way, as it so often has in the past. Through my journey I have learned to trust myself a little more and ignore what the world says. I have gone with my instinct when it comes to a job, a place to live, or a relationship. It was difficult at first to separate the facts my mind created to the feeling my heart had. Even more difficult to explain this to others who were not one with their intuition, but I learned to release that and follow my gut, which is tied to my heart.

There is a freedom that comes with following our intuition, an opening within our hearts and souls and bodies that allows us to move through life with a different kind of confidence. I want to feel that always, everyday of my life. I want to be able to dance through my path so sure of each step that my soul is the captain of my body and my heart is the sail. Have the courage to live with your heart. Listen to its secrets and allow it to guide you.

So to you I say, Stop, Drop and Choose. What does your heart say?


A practice to become more in tune with your intuition is to sit in a quiet space by yourself, close your eyes and take a few deeps breaths to clear your mind from wandering thoughts. Once you are relaxed, think of a question you may have been asking yourself. Maybe it’s a choice you need to make. *{I found it easier to start with yes or no questions.}

Once you think of this, what is the first thought to enter your mind? That is your answer. That is your higher self and intuition responding over your analytical mind. This is the truth before we tear it apart and make excuses as to why it cannot be that way. Try it. Live it. See what happens in your life when you do.

*Examples of questions to begin with:

Is this the right job for me?

Is this the right car for me?